Lolita.

So, it was my birthday yesterday, two days before having celebrated it at the beach with a barbeque, thanks to all those who came and of course a very special thank you to my darling, Jane for the most awesome gifts ever, which is apart from her constant outbursts of premenstrual moodswings, and her love and of course, her nonsense. Love you!

  

 

   

I really, honestly am god bloody tired, I’m studying for my A’s, so yeah, no time to think of anything to say.

Frenzy.

Despite my constant proclamation of perspective realism, I do accept the fact that there is a threshold of reality we all perceive; the laptop in front of me, the ceiling above, the walls, the trees, the rocks, the tables, chairs, vases, cigarettes, these are commonly consistent with our threshold of reality, its quantum value, its physical existence, the ability to reciprocate with it with our five main senses.

But people have to understand, reality is inconsistent.

The quality of something being real depends on our perspective of life; the way we accept and reject items, events, metaphysical forces, ghosts, demons, gods.

But is it only its physical quality that we judge its realism?

We accept certain events as real (that someone murdered another, an event that can only be proven via forensics, investigation, interrogation), we also accept numbers as real, but we don’t see a natural physical numeric in existence, but we still accept it as real.

Thus reality can be the value of realism within an event,the acceptance of a statement (how much of the spiritual do you believe, do you believe in ghosts?) a scientific algorithm, and the physical appearance of an item, making it then a unit of measurement, which we have to confirm the consistency of its realism.

Reality does not comprehend to existence.

The existence of the material:

Ok, so things, objects, things that subject to matter, has a physical and chemical quality; the material.

So what subjects the material to existence…?

Okay, say you put a piece of paper in front of me.

You ask me: What is this?

Me: A piece of paper.

You: is this real?

Me: yes.

You: does it exist?

Me: no.

You: why?

I take it, tear it in half, align the two pieces, tear in half again, repeat, then place it in front of you and ask, “Now what do we have?”

You: (assuming you understand) A stack of paper.

Me: exactly, so what happened to the piece of paper?

You: you tore it into pieces.

Me: exactly, so does that piece of paper exists?

You: no…?

Me: right, cause even if I arrange these pieces to resemble its former form, it will not be a piece of paper, I can do this many times, I can even split it to a microscopic level, but it will never become a piece of paper, if you track it back to its organic form, you just get a bunch of atoms.

This concludes that the whole differs from the sum of its parts, and that the only thing that exists is its atomic structure, hey, it’ll be even different if we could go much smaller.

Thus I’ve explained that even something physical cannot exist, and I’m trying to correct the psychological term, ‘The Whole is Greater than the Sum of its Parts’, which of course could be incorrect due to its various methods of approach.

You get pissed off and place another piece of paper in front of me.

Fractal.

The binary conduct of the human perception lies within the five senses; the ability to process our surroundings with five biological tools is a wonder in itself. But as humans, we are never impressed, nor satisfied.

We try to experiment and seek paranormal and para-dimensional realms which we perceive to exist, be it anthropologically, religiously, or just out of our own plain belief.

So, the five senses, the states of conscience and the individual acceptance of existence play a role in the perception of our reality.

Could it be that the human psyche is more than what we have so far learnt from it, could it be that reality is more than what it is, could this entire experience be a sixth sense, I don’t know.

But perhaps the universe is a set of systems under one intertwined, inter-dimensional, hyper-complex system, and that our normal psyche does not reciprocate.

The reality of things is then altered.

Thus we experiment, try all sorts of things, believe in all sorts of things to compensate for what we feel is empty, the strive for understanding, for some sort of perfection.

Perhaps it is this unrest of the unknowing of our ethics, our culture, our origins, our religions, our bylaws that fail us as a systematic species, and our myriad conception of what is good and what is evil, in order to set us apart from other individuals that we fail to comply with our existence.

But where is the natural, evident structure or system of such values, the origin to all these pathetic excuses, there is none; there is no natural structure of hierarchy and order and value.

So…

A method to alternate perception, a personal favourite of mine: Sensory Deprivation.

A tank and a legal dosage of any hallucinogenic (commonly amphetamines), the user will experience something beyond the conscience (be it they accept it as real or just some sort of intrinsic dwelling).

This heightening of the cognitive process allows the user to explore parts of the brain hardly used and will ‘travel’ the mind with a deeper understanding and conception.

Things appear more or less than they are, unquantifiable by physical standards, the user might develop an existential view of all existence, to a point of nihilism (in my case) that everything is physically ordained and that the quantum value of something is just a physical measurement and that it does not equate to its intrinsic value (which is then equated to nothing as there is then no such thing).

Life and existence on a whole becomes a vicissitude of just pure matrixes. There is then, no mundane.

This understanding of the self allows negation of the self, to accept the self as part of the the quantum equation, thus negating all value.

This could either be a withdrawal to the animalistic quality of the primordial human, or, a whole new super philosophy like that of Nietzsche’s Zarathustra, the Ubermensch.

A posthumous understanding, or just the lack of interest.

But the understanding of the self could also be a super acceptance of the self, and the process can be varied.

But be it an esoteric combustion of the metaphysical dwelling, or some sort of inter-dimensional perplex, like ink blotting onto one page to the one below it; spilling from one realm onto another, or even a wildean illusion that projected itself from its dormant dwelling as an entity within the cortex, this phenomena, this hallucination if you prefer to call it, can only be experienced upon the consumption of mind alternating substances and isolating all nervous activity to just the thought.

It then becomes a key to unlocking a place in our cognition that we cannot experience without first eliminating all absolutist thinking.

Thus, perception is the phenomena.